6 Signs That Your Partner Is Spying On You

The biggest problem with suspicion, mistrust, and jealousy is that you can never prove a negative. If your partner suspects you of cheating, stealing money, or hiding something from them, they might confront you, or they may let this emotional wound fester.

As we’ve mentioned, you can never prove negative; this means that if they tap your phone and don’t find anything suspicious, they won’t assume you’re innocent; they’ll just assume you’re not discussing it via phone.

IMAGE: UNSPLASH

There are only two ways to solve this problem (since proving your innocence is off the table).

Confront them.
Leave them.

Still, how do you know that your partner is spying on you? If they are, they’re doing it secretively, which makes detection a bit harder. Well, here are some signs that this might be the case.

1. Increased Level Of Their Own Secrecy

Ironically, while spying and accusing you of having something to hide, they’re actually the ones having something to hide. What are they hiding? Well, a lot of things. First, they’re hiding their mistrust.

It’s almost guaranteed that they won’t confront you directly about the fact they don’t trust you. They don’t want to lose the optics war (the way they see it).

Second, they’re hiding their malevolent activity. They won’t disclose that they’re contacting your friends to see if you’re really there and if your story from a few weeks ago checks out.

They won’t disclose that they followed you a few days ago, and they certainly won’t disclose that they’ve installed a spy app or a tracker on your phone.

Once again, the most ironic thing in the world is the fact that the more they suspect you, the more secretive they become. You see, jealousy is an emotion that consumes all else.

They might even start slacking in their work and quit their hobbies in order to track you 24/7.

2. Increased Interest In Your Devices

If your partner suspects you of cheating, they’ll show an increased interest in your devices. They’ll want to know who you’re chatting with, what your search history is, and more. They do everything to make sure spying on you yields results.

Since they’ll suspect you of having secret files and folders, they’ll browse your devices randomly in search of “proof.” They’ll also be very jumpy when confronted about this. They might get offended at something that’s barely an insinuation instead of just going along with it jokingly as they might have a few months ago.

If you go to the bathroom and leave your phone on the coffee table (because you clearly have nothing to hide), you might notice them acting anxiously when you reenter the room. They might end up sitting even further from the device than before.

This extra care not to look suspicious is the most suspicious of them all.

3. A Strange App On Your Device

In 2024, they no longer have to place a bug or a tracker when spying on you: you’re carrying it in your pocket. Chances are that they’ve installed a keylogger or a spy app on your smartphone.

Now, the very point of spy apps is that they’re not discovered, so don’t expect to find a strange-looking icon. However, if you check your processes, you’ll see them there.

Still, what exactly are you looking for? what are you trying to find?

Well, there are different spying apps for both operating systems, and you’ll do well to familiarize yourself with those that match your own phone.

For instance, you need to go through the list of spy apps for iPhone in order to recognize one when you see it installed on your device.

4. Changing Their Own Passwords

So, why are they changing their own passwords when it’s clearly you who has something to hide and not them (according to their own philosophy)? The truth is that their devices are probably tools that they’re using to coordinate this.

As we’ve already mentioned, if they’ve talked to your friends to check if you really were at their place and how long you were there, this will be in their chat. They can’t afford to risk you seeing this.

Second, the spy app that they’re using probably has an equivalent app installed on their own device. This way, they’re monitoring you and tracking all of your online activity.

It’s also quite likely that they’re not alone in this. Sure, they might be just obsessed and in their own world when it comes to this, but what about their accomplices? They might have a confidant, a friend, or even a group on Reddit/Discord where they share their suspicions.

This usually further fuels the flame of jealousy.

This is what they might try to hide by changing their password.

5. They’re Extra Agitated When You Have To Go Out

Sure, they’re always suspicious, but it gets even worse when you have to go out or join a company for a team-building event. They know! They’ve read the statistics, and they’re aware that a lot of people cheat with coworkers.

The problem is that if you’re innocent, you’re completely oblivious to the fake hints you’re sending out. It’s like in Shakespeare’s Othello. If Desdemona did cheap, she would have a story ready for her husband. She would gaslight him, play him like a fiddle, and end the play alive.

One of the biggest fallacies is that your innocence is enough to protect you from accusations.

This is why you don’t bite your tongue when an opposite-sex coworker makes a funny joke or does something brilliant. This is why you can’t stop talking about the person sitting next to you.

It’s clear to see how this will only make matters worse and why you’ll have them behave even more erratically than usual.

Still, this could also just be a sign that they’re jealous. Jealous, and even very, very jealous, doesn’t mean that they’re necessarily spying. They could be eaten from within without ever taking action. It is, however, quite unlikely.

6. Unexpected And Unexplained Knowledge

Sometimes, a partner will ask a question that they shouldn’t even know to ask. They’ll ask you about your stay at a place they have no business of knowing you were at. They might ask you a question about an old flame that you never told them about.

The thing is that, as they start to dig deeper and deeper, they’ll start spying, go into your past, and find out surprising things, such as details that you’ll never manage to figure out how they’ve gotten in the first place.

Most of the time, it won’t be even things you tried to hide. It will just be something that was so unimportant and minuscule that you just didn’t see it worth sharing. Sometimes, you’ll just forget about these things.

Not them; a person in this state of mind never forgets, but they might get a blurry vision when it comes to what they are allowed to disclose. This can be an early sign that they are spying on you.

Spying – Catching This Early On Still Gives You Options

Jealousy becomes progressively worse, and if you spot some of the above-listed symptoms that indicate that they are spying on you, and confront your partners about them, you still have a chance to salvage the relationship. The longer it goes on, the slimmer your odds become.

Also, if you really were up to no good, now, at least, you have a better idea of how to hide it all.