I read about this a few days ago in the Wall Street Journal, and I wasn’t going to write about it on Bit Rebels, but it’s stuck with me, which is usually a sign I should go ahead and put it out there. First of all, I want to tell you that I have zero firsthand experience with Internet dating, but I’ve written about it probably a dozen times. There have been many online dating services that have popped up over the past few years, and it’s always fun to see how people are meeting and interacting online in a romantic way. The article in the Wall Street Journal took it to a place I haven’t seen anyone take it before though.
It was an article called Hacking The Hyperlinked Heart, and it was an excerpt from a book that will be available in a few weeks called “Data, A Love Story: How I Gamed Online Dating To Meet My Match.” It’s about an independent, successful woman named Amy Webb who navigated the Internet dating scene well enough to find her husband, but the way she did it is what was so unique.
After posing as a man online and checking out firsthand how 96 women interact with men online, after a ton of trial-and-error, and after discovering a short list of important things to know, she learned how to manipulate the Internet dating scene to meet her needs. She discovered not only what men like, but what women think men like. She also discovered that the majority of people lie about their height (more than their weight), which I personally thought was interesting.
She lays out a very specific list of things to know if you are Internet dating. Some of them include the fact that women with curly hair are at a disadvantage, women shouldn’t mention their careers since it’s extra intimidating online (reeeeeally?), you shouldn’t use more than 3-5 photos in your profile since after that they hurt rather than help you, and if someone IMs you – you can IM back right away, but if it’s email, wait 20 hours.
I thought these 3 sentences from that article were most interesting, “It’s really hard to be funny in print – especially if you’re naturally prone to sarcasm. I found that people who thought they were being funny in their profiles weren’t. Instead, they seemed angry and aloof.”
Like I said, I have no firsthand Internet dating experience; however, I have a TON of online relationship experience (colleagues, friends, etc.). My only personal advice is to be careful and guard your heart. Newbies to online relationships often think they can’t get hurt since it’s all on the computer, but that’s not true. In my opinion, it stings even more online since there are no real hugs to give or receive when it’s time to makeup. If you are a smart, successful, independent woman who is in the Internet dating scene, you might want to click over to the WSJ to read the entire article or even buy this book when it comes out in a few weeks. This kind of stuff is so fascinating to me.